When I was a full-time scriptwriter, it was always fun telling people what I did for work. TV is an interesting industry to those who aren’t in it (as compared to say, engineering), and I was still sparkling with the enthusiasm. I was following my passion just four months after working! I was living the dream.
I’m living the dream!
Of course, I learnt much later that following your passion is not always a good thing, but that’s another post for another time.
However, I noticed a particular trend. The same questions kept coming up. And it was when I had to attend four events in a row (birthday party, wedding, some dinner thing, and the last I forgot) that I finally started to nail down the questions that I always get asked.
It took some more meet ups with new folk or old friends to finally test my theories and confirm that yes, these are the four questions that I always get asked when i say I work as a scriptwriter. And by that time I had gotten a little… bored with the questions. It was always these four questions. It has never deviated.
So I started playing a little game. I would pull out my mental checklist everytime I met someone new, and mentally tick off the questions as they were asked. I promised I would congratulate the person who didn’t ask me all four questions – but that has never happened.
Congratulatio – oh, wait, you did ask me all four questions.
Enough preamble. Here are the four questions (and my answers) to the questions that everyone asks a scriptwriter, as I groused to my best friend one night.
1)What shows do you write?
I will invariably reply with “what shows have you watched?” and watch the person squirm to name some television programs.
The truth is, not many people, especially those who are IT literate and have unrestricted access the Internet, watch local TV anymore. Which also happens to intersect with the people I meet. I can understand that.
But come on, think a little. If you’re not going to know what shows are on air, how will my answer be meaningful to you?
2)Do you get to meet the actors?
Yes, I do. And they are normal people. I’m sure they’ll tell you as much. I’m sure if you think about it, you’ll come to that conclusion too.
If this is the very first question that’s asked, it’s also rather insulting. If you don’t ask any other question before this, it implies that you think television shows hang entirely on the cast.
It doesn’t. It’s a team effort. Ask me about my contributions before you ask me about what your eye candy is like.
This was my wallpaper for awhile. It really did help inspire me.
3)How do you get your ideas/inspiration/creativity?
By eavesdropping on conversations. Like the one you had with so-and-so person just now. Or that one that you also overheard but didn’t dare to admit, heh.
This is actually my favourite question of the lot, and if you start with this question, you get +10 respect points.
But the truth is, like every other industry, it’s practice and hard work. And really, a lot of eavesdropping. Take off your earphones when you’re on public transport or in a crowded area, and listen for a while. Chances are, you’ll hear someone complaining about something, or you’ll hear about a possible affair. I kid you not.
4)Wow, this thing that just happened is so funny/interesting, you should write it into a script!
This is usually the last question that gets asked. After the first three questions are asked, as long as something even vaguely interesting happens (like a pair of chopsticks drop on the floor), there will be uproarious laughter and the cry of “you should write that into a script!”
I’ll pleasantly smile at that comment. But 40% of the time, I’ll get this next follow up comment, and I’ll struggle to prevent an eye roll.
“Eh I helped you do your job! Remember to pay me when the show is out ah!”
Um, no. This is incredibly irritating. If you drop your pencil and I help you pick it up, does that mean you have to pay me? Same principle.
The Muttonmobile is rolling its eyes.
A very unfortunate thing happened a few days after the grouse. I had lunch with my best friend and his family, and it so happened that his father sat in between us.
So I struck up conversation. Inevitably, it came around to what I did for a living. And then I watched him turn around in horror as he watched his dad ask:
“Do you meet the actors often?”
Followed by “Where do you get your ideas from?” and “What shows have you written?”
I saw him cringe as his father ticked off each question in the mental checklist that we both knew already. I was cringing inside too, but there was no way I could stop the barrage of questions once it began.
To top it off, a fishball fell on the floor somewhere, which prompted the remark: “Ah ha ha you can put that in your script!”
Help.
I should have written a script about that story.
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