Most movies lived up to their hype in 2015. Then we had some terrible duds that deserved to be shoved into the Crack of Doom, never to see the light of day again. It’s a terrible pity, because all that money frittered away could have been spent on something useful or given to a charitable organisation, rather than torturing our eyes with crap. So before the year ends, let me bring back nasty memories of 6 worst movies that you wasted your time on.
The sheer pretentious of this entire film just reeks of some inaccessible “artistic” hogwash. Is there even a point to having a one-armed woman when it didn’t matter that she only had one arm? Is it even believable that a post-apocalyptic world would spend so much time modding their vehicles into life-sized Mask toys? “Mad Max: Fury Road” is the movie equivalent of an attention-seeking bimbo who has no idea how devoid of substance she is. And I hear it’s spawning a sequel. Good grief.
There was just so much potential for “Pixels” to be a good film. Never mind the ridiculous premise, we could buy in to that. We could even buy in to the President of the United States being a literal keyboard warrior. But the film was so slow, the action was so thin (there’s no other action besides all the key moments you see in posters) and there was so much focus on Adam Sandler’s character when you know he’s not even trying to act anymore. There was never any reason to root for the main characters. And if you’re not on the side of heroes, then the movie has failed utterly.
“Fantastic Four” is not an easy franchise to get right. The success of the comic was as much a part of the era it was born in, as it was of the adventures that the heroes went on. But most importantly, this film forgot that it was a superhero movie, and instead gave us some science fiction horror fest. You can go gritty like “Man of Steel” (which was pushing it, honestly) if you remember that at the end of the day, your protagonist is a larger than life character. But “Fantastic Four” forgot about the superhero theatrics, and if you deleted the last scene of the film (where they reference the name “Fantastic Four”) then nobody would have guessed that it was a superhero movie.
And I was hoping for Annihilus in a sequel.
The problem with this remake was that it was too faithful to the original, without taking into account that it’s now 33 years later. It resulted in a plot that treated audiences like idiots (does anyone really not know what a poltergeist is?!), and then mutated into some weird science fiction flick halfway. It had scares in the first half, but the second half became some terrible special effects bonanza which was neither interesting nor scary.
“Extraterrestrial” felt like the writers went to TV Tropes and tried to stuff in as many stereotypes as possible. Tropes aren’t bad in and of itself, but there was nothing original besides the cliches that were shoved in. The worst part was how long this whole film took to play out – 106 minutes of your life that you’d never get back (well, 103 if you skip the credits).
This train wreck of a film gradually forgets who its main character is, shifting the heroics to George Clooney’s character by the end. That might be OK if you weren’t yawning halfway during this abysmally long drama about random badges and hidden worlds. The worst part is that Tomorrowland isn’t even that awesome.
So how was your time wasted in 2015?
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